Disclaimer: I LOVE the National Enquirer. It follows its editorial mission better than almost any of U.S. publication, and its investigative reporters are underrated. I read it with a boulder of salt, but read it I do (I make my wife buy it for me).

I've been following the Orange County Register more closely in recent weeks, and I'm beginning to wonder: is the Register trying to take over the National Enquirer niche in Orange County? Among the Enquirer-esque stories published Wednesday:

Is there a $100,000 penny in your couch cushions?

OC beauties junkies gobble up battery-powered mascara

Mother gives birth on lawn ... her own

Homeless patient spent hospital money on crack

It's a gas: Human waste being turned into car fuel